LET’S RUB MINDS 1: CAN I TURN BACK THE HANDS OF TIME?

  

  LADIES GET IN HERE! How is the week going? I have enough random gist to fill a whole sixty leaves exercise book but I’d prefer to cut the Indian film short and just say, I got a new job. Yaay, I’ve been so excited with the job kini that I didn’t even check my email. I finally did today and to my utmost surprise, I got a response for the LET’S RUB MINDS series. I must confess right here and now, I’ve been dancing on my heels all morning. It’s two o’ clock in the afternoon and now I think I’m finally calm enough to work on this post. Before I start, I want to say a big thank you to you guys that read and respond. I get that you all can’t comment due to some technicalities but I wish to say that I am overwhelmed by the love and attention. I’m still doing this doggedly because you guys are on the other end reading. Thank you!

  What do you do when time is fast running out? When I say running out, I mean when the time to settle down is fast running out or has already run out. Even my very liberal mind would have one or two feelings of insecurity if when I’m supposed to be addressed as a MRS meets me a MISS. Well, I wouldn’t be bothered if I’m the only one that exists in my own angle of the universe but you see, world people and their aproko can’t ever let the single lady take two deep breaths without sticking the “go and marry” theme song down her throat. Our mothers are not excluded in this calculated effort of hellish frustration as they figure out ways to add it to prayer points during devotion and as compulsory ingredients for the ogbono, ewedu and oha soup! What’s worse, imagine that desperation is beginning to set in as you can’t seem to find one single responsible brother? Well, today's story goes beyond not finding  a brother. As you are about to find out, this story is a very emotional one that shows how far one decision can change the course of one's life. This story is a must read for ladies that let themselves be fooled by a cute face and sugarcoated lips.Please note that names have been changed to hide the identity of the sender.

    

   Hello Mama Zeus, my name is Regina. I’ve been reading your blog for some time now and although you not as consistent as I expect, I like the sincerity in your posts. When I saw your last post, I decided to share my own experience albeit anonymously (I hope my mail would be the first you would get on your new series).

   Like I stated earlier, my name is Regina and I am in my late thirties. All my adult life up until now that is, I have always fancied the idea of love and all its attributes. I spent most of my teenage years planning my superb wedding and painting the picture of my dream man in my head. Being a Christian, I strongly believe in the need to keep myself for the man of my dreams so it was quite easy for me to stay away from sex.

   I put in my best in everything I did because I imagined that the One would love to have a woman competent in all her dealings. I read loads of relationship advice books and articles because I wanted to be perfect for the Man who would steal my heart

   None of the information I garnered prepared me for the moment I finally met the supposed one. One day, I set out with my cousins to have a little fun. We chose to go to see a movie and then have a few drinks.

   While on the queue to buy tickets, my eyes caught an impeccable white shirt. White is my favorite color so I understand my excitement. I just stood transfixed gazing at the shirt and saying to myself, whoever this guy is must be a neat freak till the lady behind me nudged me to reality.

   Fast forward to movie time, Mr Impeccable shirt was sitting just by my right hand. The movie was a comedy so it was almost impossible not to share comments. While we exchanged laughs and small talk, I noticed that Mr impeccable was quite handsome. Dark skinned, pearly teeth that shone like elephant tusks in the dark of the cinema. My heart was beating too fast, the comic actions no longer seemed funny and I noticed I was staring. Oh I already started fixing him in all my life’s plans.

  After the movie, I walked too slowly, partially ignored my cousins anticipating his “hello, one minute “line. I was certain we had chemistry sparks.

  Luckily or should I say unluckily for me, he did throw the line and that was how my worst nightmare began.

  I first noticed that Charles had quite a number of female friends. I did find that uncomfortable at first but I consoled myself with the fact that it’s normal for cute guys. Let me admit, I was a little bit overwhelmed with the fact that a man so handsome would be so interested in me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not insecure or ugly but that was my first real spark and I just couldn’t believe my luck that it’d be such a perfect guy!

  Charles had it all;  good looks, good job and great family background plus he didn’t smoke, drink or keep late nights. Guess his only comma was the fact that he had a beehive of women around, calling, texting and yada yada yada. He wasn’t the Jesus freak but at that point that was truly the least of my worries. I guess I said to myself, I can cut open his head and pour the word in.

    I made another error. Charles never directly asked me to be his girlfriend. I just assumed and went on with the flow. I turned myself to his chef, cleaner and laundry guy without pay. I suppose we dated for about a year before he started really demanding for sex. Great guy yea? I thought so too.

   The night of our first year anniversary ( I reminded him that it was our anniversary and he mumbled something and giggled then said something about him knowing all along but wanting to surprise me). We went out to some cozy place on the island (Victoria Island) for a few drinks. It was so romantic, I almost wept at my good fortune. He said the right things, looked at me the right way. The slow jazz playing did nothing to help my hormones that seemed to be at the brink of combustion.

   After our drink, he pleaded with me to spend the night with him at least to celebrate the anniversary. I had choir practice and outreach the next morning but all that flew through the window. Truth is, I thought he was going to propose to me so I prepared myself for the customary shock face and tear drops. In fact I had a mental makeover in twenty seconds. 

   At his place, he got champagne, clicked on some really slow music and asked me to dance with him. As we danced, he professed his love for me and promised to be the man I want. All my doubts fell out the door; it was an “I surrender all” moment. Then, we kissed. That simple innocent kiss on my part heralded the beginning of an experience that would mean the end of my whole life...

To be continued...